My wife keeps complaining about her nine to five job. I must admit, 4:51 is a strange time to start work.
I was only young when I learned to count. It was odd at first, even then.
A woman in the U.K. held a wedding ceremony to marry herself. “I don’t know how to tell you this, but I think that lady you just married might be crazy.”
The LIKE button: also for choosing sides in a Facebook argument without saying anything.
You can unfriend and block me on Facebook, unfollow me on Twitter, delete and block my number but you will NEVER unlick my butthole.
Borrow five dollars from a woman and they will forget. Borrow a piece of Tupperware from a woman and they will hunt you down to every corner of the planet.
We had a woman pilot one year when we went to Majorca. We were delayed for 8 hours. Turns out the previous pilot had left the hand brake on too tight.
Just bought a copy of International Cricket 2014 for my Xbox, but the disc is broken. I’m looking for a Paki now, I’ve heard they’re fcuking good at fixing cricket games