October 2014

2

I’m not opposed to manscaping, but I don’t see the point of cutting the grass until somebody takes interest in the property.

2

Apparently sex seriously improves your memory.

I read that in a book.. Wait it was a magazine.. Actually I think it was the internet.

2

Seems that every single video shared on Facebook is the greatest ever, funniest ever, best ever etc etc.
Until a video exists of Chuck Norris round-housing Justin Bieber in the face I respectfully disagree

2

I went to cinema last night and saw a movie about cheese.
It was G rated.

2

That awkward moment when two of your friends break up, and you have to decide which one you want to stay friends with. So you stay friends with the one you wanna sleep with.

1

I married my wife for sex, she married me for money…now we’re fcuking even!

2

With the chance of jail approaching, Oscar Pistorius decides to spend what could be his last night of freedom with a hot escort.

“What sort of stuff will you do?” he asked, when they got to the hotel room

“Well, I am pretty much up for anything, I have no problem with Anal, teabagging, & pissing” she replied. “But you can forget The Real Girlfriend Experience”

2

Thanks to Ebola, this Halloween, the scariest costume might turn out to be that sexy nurse uniform.